Somewhere deep inside I believe I can do anything. That belief doesn’t always manifest itself in my day to day activities, but I really do believe it. I’m naturally quite impulsive and also generally quite confident. When you pair those things together, you have a bit of a strange combination. When I watch doctor shows I imagine that I should go ahead and go to medical school so that I can fix all the people. When I watch law & order type shows I imagine myself as a bad ass attorney sticking it to the bad guys. Side note: I rarely imagine myself in law enforcement. Mostly because I’m scared of the dark, but also because the idea of me carrying or shooting a gun is enough to make anyone who knows me shoot their drink straight out of their nose. It really is just that hilarious. But anyway.
I once tried for an entire hour to pick the lock of my mother-in-law’s front door because we had accidentally left her house key at my sister-in-law’s house and since I had watched seven straight seasons of Alias, I was the obvious choice to find a way in. You know, because of all my super spy training. In unrelated news, I wasn’t successful at picking the lock, but I did watch my husband laugh harder than I ever had before or ever have since. The point is that I have a natural tendency to believe that nothing is beyond my reach – that I can do pretty much anything I want to. If I’m being honest, I love that about myself. I hope and pray that my four daughters will somehow pick that up from me.
The strange, and disappointing, thing about it, though, is that I rarely take that belief and actually try to make it reality. Something happens to me somewhere between the believing and the doing that keeps me from the trying. I can’t figure out what that is, but if I ever do I know I’ll be unstoppable.
I believe that we are all made for so much more than we allow for ourselves. So much more than we think we deserve or think we can achieve. If I could follow through on that silly notion that I can do anything, I wonder if I would actually be able to do anything.